Dating and Marriage:9 secrets to a happier relationship

Having at our side a person who loves you, respects you, values ​​you and care about you is one of the most wonderful gifts of life. We all aspire to find love. Find a person with whom to share our life, who makes us happy, who cares for us and who loves us more than anyone else in the world.

This sometimes is not easy, you run into people who apparently seem appropriate, but in the end, things go wrong. Until finally you find the one with which you can imagine a future and a life to share and everything is beautiful and wonderful.

However, relationships have many challenges: coexistence can be difficult at times, we forget to balance our needs and desires with those of our partner, we become dependent and when things are not going so well in our relationship, we feel sad, anxious and worried. Hence the importance of having an increasingly healthy relationships, which bring us much pleasure and happiness. 

To have a good relationship, it takes more than attraction, work is required and both should be willing to make the effort. Here are some tips to build a healthy relationship.

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1. Love unconditionally.

Love is a verb and therefore it must be practiced. The state of accepting a person regardless of his condition or state and making the welfare of that person your priority without wanting anything in return. Married couples are to love each other unconditionally. It all about taking into account the happiness of another without any thought of what you might get for yourself. Unconditional love requires that you don’t have to look at the weakness of your spouse, you forgive your spouse anytime they offend you, and you do not make your spouse feel less important or inferior, being patient and accommodating. It’s unconditional love when other people care about our happiness.

2. Respect for each other.

Every house which is not built upon a strong foundation, will fall likewise marriage. The marital relationship can never be conflict-free, but having mutual respect for each other will be a huge benefit to your relationship. Never take each other for granted. In a marriage where there is no respect for each other, it is not a healthy marriage. You are allowed to criticize but destructive criticism is dangerous to the health of your marriage. Give reverence to your spouse and do not in any way disregard him or her because of a shortcoming. You do not have to shout to be heard when discussing issues. Do not call your spouse names, despising your partner, attacking your partner when having a discussion, abuse your partner verbally or physically or cheat on your partner all this does not show respect. If you do not place value on your partner and you always disregard their feelings they will become conceited, closed up and defensive.

 3. Manage conflict.

We, humans, are imperfect and we all have our differences, it completely natural. With our imperfection, we always fall short of expectation. Misunderstanding will always spring up in our marriage due to our imperfection. Marriage is never conflict-free. But what makes a successful marriage is knowing how to argue and after being able to come to a peaceful conclusion. Solving disputes and disappointment is the cornerstone of a happy marriage. The key point is this, learn how to fight right, how to apologize after the fight and finding a lasting solution to the problem, is your best bet to a blissful marriage.

4. Have a forgiven heart.

The is no relationship without issues and a relationship means vulnerability. You either disappoint or be disappointed. You have no control over this matter the best you can do in painful circumstances is to have a big heart. A heart that can never be satisfied or can be filled to the brim with pain or disappointment less it explodes. Our heart should be big enough to forgive always without keeping track of the past. No matter what you do the arrow of pain and hurt will be shot at you but what will make you survive is when you have the shield of forgiveness. You must learn to forgive it important because unforgiveness breeds resentment and bitterness. Bitterness and resentment over time create hatred. Learn to forgive and forget even when your spouse refuses to apologize for an offense. Do not harbor the pain, you are hurting yourself.

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5. Learn to compromise.

To compromise require that you should be patient, open-minded, work as a team and above all self-sacrifice. You don’t have to agree with everything your spouse says, as a matter of fact, it is completely impossible to be on the same page every time. This will surely bring disagreement. All you can do is to be open to considering their point of view. Learn to give up on your desires just to make your spouse have his or her way. Because you are no longer alone where you only think about yourself but you have to put your marriage above your personal interests. Learn to understand each other. Anytime there is an issue, find common grounds and compromise

6. Do not neglect the relationship

People become careless and dormant, which is very common over time, in the relationship.  Then all those charms begin to dwindle and all the attention that was given at the beginning disappears. It is when people ask themselves, without really knowing why "What did I do wrong?". Therefore, the relationship is like a child or any other association that you want to do, it needs care, attention, and affection.

7. Be open and honest

Trust is still one of the big buzzwords that form the basis of every relationship. To open up and talk about your concerns and deep emotions. Experts see it as one of the essential recipes, which makes for a happy relationship: "The feeling of being able to express oneself to the other partner with his innermost self, to be saved with his or her weaknesses and quirks creates stronger bonding and closeness. These are important ingredients for a much stable love relationship. "If you have an open and honest relationship with your partner, this, in turn, has positive effects on your communication and conflict management. Building trust requires mutual commitment. Trust can’t be built if only one partner is willing to do this and the other isn’t.  it’s important for both partners to trust and be trusted, to open up and be vulnerable with each other.

 8. Learning to talk to each other

The mere ability to speak and listen does not say anything about the ability to communicate, communication is such a huge part of our day-to-day lives. When done correctly, it helps us understand how the other person is feeling and what they are thinking. We leave our parents' houses and do not realize that we often did not properly learn relationship and communication. To speak with each other must be learned; in every love relationship. Especially women complain about too little communication, too little conversation, too little time to deal with each other. Happy couples are different from non-happy ones, partners in happy love relationship talk a lot about personal concerns. They exchange their personal experience and state of health in conversation; tell each other what happened to them, what causes them fear or joy. When trying to communicate with your partner, it’s important, to be honest with them. Using the concept of dialogue is the best framework conditions that enable a very effective communication with each other. The dialogue allows one to turn to each other, to perceive oneself and the others, to listen and develop together, as well as to create trust and a rule-free mode of conversation.

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 9.Do not take your partner for granted

We are so eager to be understood, valued, and perceived by someone. This unconscious expectation breaks many relationships If not realized however, this must first take its start in yourself. What has to start with you is appreciation for everything including yourself. Taking your partner for granted could be in many forms. The fastest road to relationship collapse is taking your partner for granted. If your partner never says "thank you. “After You do all kinds of stuff to make your partner happy, from cooking a meal,  to doing big, complicated favors. Or If your partner cheats on you, because they think they'll get away with it.  Your partner is taking you for granted. All, this attitude is important; being appreciative, not cheating, valuing the opinions of your partner and being romantic spice up the relationship. Especially being appreciative of your partner means not taking his existence and his so-being for granted and to have the willingness to be with him. By recognizing your partner and respecting his being shows, you value not only him/her but also yourself and your choices

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